Living in the South has its advantages and disadvantages, just like everywhere else. I am happy to say that being Southern is not quite the cultural tragedy that it once was, we don't have AS many tv shows and movies displaying what the general population deems as our inherit ability to be completely stupid. Thanks to Tom Clancy and the the like, we now have even a few novel-based films that feature prominent,strong,and articulate Southern lawyers spinning horseshit into Egyptian cotton in the courtroom to insure that justice is served. I love these movies but I hate that everyone in them is always so sweaty. Yes, the South is hot but we got central air along with the rest of the country so I'm not sure why everyone else thinks that we don't use it.
Although, there is nothing quite like being all dewy from perspiration, holding a gin and tonic on the front porch and pontificating on days gone by and the firey desires that burn from within.. Ok, I don't actually do that.... very often...
So, like I said, lots to love about being here. The mild winters, magnolia trees and their intoxicating scent, sweet tea and everything all fried and dipped in mayonnaise, the way everyone will shun you if you serve anything but Duke's mayonnaise (we are the only sub-culture that could get that fired up about the integrity of whipped eggs.), the polite tendencies of the people, the seemingly slower pace of life in general, etc...etc..If you live here , you know it and if you don't, you have a whole list of things to tell me why living anywhere else in the world is better..
BUT, one of the irritating things about living here that I never noticed too much until the-social-network-that-I-refuse-to-mention-by-name-again-unless-they-pay-me..Bless our hearts, we just don't spell very well.
That is not to say that there aren't oodles of nearly illiterate people from all geographic locations on the internet because,I gotta tell you, I weep a little for future generations every time I scroll through my newsfeed. But, what I have noticed is that Southerners consistently misspell the same words and now I've figured out why.
We're doing just like our teachers told us to do. We're "sounding them out".
I wrote a very short but mean rant about this subject once,a long time ago, because another-social-network-that-fell-off-the-map,shoved in my face that almost everyone I know misspells "want" and "won't" by using them interchangeably. I could not for the life of me figure this out but a short while ago, it hit me. It's a pronunciation issue.
So, here's a challenge for you to prove my point. If you are from the South, say this sentence loudly and slowly;
"I want to go with you."
I guarantee you that if this had been an oral exercise and I had asked you to write this sentence, a helluva lot of you would have written this ;
"I wont to go with you."
Because that's how you pronounce it.
I'm not really sure why it seems to work the other way around but it does. I have seen countless examples of status updates saying
"I want go in there anymore because they are rude."
Or something to that nature. So, let's clear the air right now and fix this..
To WANT something is to express desire. "I WANT you to go with me."
To use the word WON'T,first you need an apostrophe because it is a contraction. It is used to replace "will not" in a sentence. "I WON'T do that anymore."
Got the hang of it now?
The next example of this is the word QUIET. Say it with me, because this actually does have two syllables and it's the only one that Southerners don't use more than they need to pronounce. Time after time, I see it spelled QUITE, because again, that's how we say it.
The word QUITE is an adverb, used as an exclamation in most sentences.
"This is QUITE good, I am really enjoying it."
QUIET is the word you are looking for when expressing that something,someone or somewhere has no sound.
I'm sure there are a few others, but I will have to return to ammend this when I think of them...
So, in closing, let me say again that I love being Southern and I love my own twangy accent, so please by all means, let's continue to "push buggies" and "mash buttons" and ask about everyone's "mama an 'nem" but let's also try and make an effort to look like we know what we're talking about because, let's face it, most of our communication these days is through writing. *SIGH* I miss just talking, don't you?
SO, let's recap people, say it with me.
"Ms. A is QUITE the smartass for writing this blog and I WANT to punch her in the face but I WON'T. I will just be QUIET and listen because all she really wants is to save the world, one lesson at a time."
As you were....
